Artist Archive
Unfathomably big
April 13, 2015
It’s unfathomably big. I feel it strongly. I witness myself transforming. I’m not sure that the experiences I recall actually happened to “me” Life is like a puzzle in the shape of a jewel, and each day I am playing with the pieces. But it comes to fit together somehow, more each day. The jewel […]
2015 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
Shame
February 13, 2015
I am shameful. I have transgressed. The center of my chest itches to be scratched. I retreat, I recede, I withdraw my wounded self into the shell from which I came. I want to dissolve. I want to go back in time and destroy things. Nobody is perfect, but I am all too familiar […]
2015 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
Sensing the world
December 19, 2014
I speak a physical language. Everything that moves me, does so in its form, its texture, the sensual aspects of experiencing it. I am deeply excited by books, but more by their covers, the size and opacity of the text against a white page, the heft and weight of the compiled paper, the colors chosen […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
Writing tonight it keeps coming
September 29, 2014
Tonight, I remember that I know how to watch the sun set. My mind can dance again. Holding everything without dropppp drop drop droping the water is deeeeeeee e e e eep. I want to open something that is closed right now. I think I can do this […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
“The only people for me are the mad ones…”
September 1, 2014
Champaign, IL: At some point a couple weeks ago I was searching for the nearby Target. I took one wrong turn on a midwestern road and ended up on a freeway heading straight here… My west coast wildness is oozing at […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
Void
July 3, 2014
There is a familiar emptiness that arises, always around but often dormant. It is around even when I am at work, looking at my computer screen and feeling the meaningless futility of what I am doing. Does this work matter to anyone? For anything? It is around when I am home, after a day to […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
A circle of thoughts and some extensions
May 30, 2014
What I think about when I’m idle and alone: -What should I do? -Maybe I should call someone to hang out… who? -It’s always the same people. Why do I wanna see them anyway? -Maybe I shouldn’t just socialize to avoid being alone. -What do I wanna do, then? -What actually matters? -People do matter […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
On thursday
March 21, 2014
It’s okay to be sad Sadness, like this, it’s about surrendering to the situation. A lot of other feelings can stand in for sadness. But sadness emerges when you stop building layers on top of it. Sadness is the last straw. There is always a last straw, after every other one in the bunch has […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
How he doesn’t give
March 18, 2014
Everyone knows priceless value whatever Mastercard can’t buy This American boy raised on oatmeal and Ayn Rand propoganda He cannot receive or accept any gifts from me Because receiving in earnest makes any decent man indebted by some force, not dollars, but by some deeper universal law, that binds us all in the […]
2014 | Uncategorized Comments (0)
I wonder what feeds me
February 9, 2014
One I know for sure: Things, and people, and places that have aged. Wrinkles, rust, chipped paint, wisdom, laugh lines, a certain slow buffer in living. I want to hear music in a language I don’t understand. I look at a book with pictures of humans in places I have never been, living lives I […]